


Read my mind

by leooX



Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Awkwardness, Body Dysmorphic Disorder, Eating Disorders, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Self Confidence Issues, Sexual Content, Trans Character, binge eating
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-18
Updated: 2017-02-18
Packaged: 2018-09-25 08:53:02
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,537
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9812066
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/leooX/pseuds/leooX
Summary: Tyler meets Josh pre-binge.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Alright so I'm not sure how I feel about this. I've been writing this for four days so I'm uploading it anyway.  
> Let me know what you think.  
> I know I should be updating the few other stories but I honestly hate them all and I have no inspiration

Tyler had never been a strong person. He didn't have a lot of muscle mass, and even when he tried working out it was always unsuccessful. He figured he lacked the testosterone or just general ability to stay at a gym long enough to become somewhat fit and healthy.

Simple things like opening doors or shifting his couch or carrying a shopping basket like he had been for the past five minutes, were all a struggle.

It was 10pm and Tyler had finished work two hours ago, and he only sat around for an hour before he got started to feel bored and lonely.

He sniffed, looking at the variation of biscuits and crackers on the shelving in front of him, searching for chocolate anything.  
He reached up, grabbing a pack of triple chocolate cookies to add to the mountain of food in his cart.  
He'd totaled all his food up in his head, and it all came up to over $30. Definitely not the worst he'd ever done, but the oven bake pastries and ice cream tubs were weighing it down and so he decided it was time to pay.

He started back down the aisle, turning on his heel with his eyes on the food he had.  
He felt a weight walk into him, and he was pushed back slightly, his basket tipping back and some of its contents rolling to the floor.  
He gasped quietly, not looking up because of the imminent wave of self-consciousness that washed over him. He stepped back and breathed out a 'sorry' before dropping himself to his knees painfully.

"Oh God, sorry, do you want some help?"  
Tyler cringed at the man's slow reaction, but also his own foolish one.  
"No… it's fine." He mumbled, picking a packet of biscuits up and putting them back slowly, his heart thudding in his chest, knowing the man was still stood in front of him.  
"No, i'll- I'll help."  
Tyler crushed his eyes shut for a moment and breathed out through his nose, "thanks."  
Josh kneeled down, picking things up quickly but almost mechanically, shoving them back into their container. He smelt wierd, Tyler thought. Like sweat desperately concealed by musk deodorant and masculine scented aftershave.  
"No problem. I see you in here a lot- big family?"  
Tyler flushed and smiled wearily, "No."  
The man didn't ask anymore questions, and Tyler tucked his chin into his chest, pulling his hoodie over his chin with his teeth as he picked the final cheescake from the tiled flooring.

He let the cloth fall from his mouth and stood, not accepting the help of the stranger in this task.  
"I'm Josh."  
Tyler nodded and gripped the handle of the basket, heaving it up with a small struggle.  
"Here- let me-"  
The hamper was taken from his hands easily, and Tyler took the first short-lived glance at Josh, seeing his toned arms, short sleeved shirt, and a slim body before looking away in shame.  
When Josh began to walk, Tyler did too, fumbling for his wallet from his pocket and taking out the money before hand.  
"What's your name, then?"

Tyler really didn't wants someone to talk to. He didn't want to say his name because he didn't want Josh to feel like he was making friends, but this man was carrying his heavy cart without being bothered.  
"Its Tyler, thanks again for-"  
Josh shrugged him off with a ' _ppfff_ ' noise, putting the basket down on the conveyor belt and, strangely, walking around the counter and pressing something into the screen on the till.  
"You… work here?"  
"Mhm. I said I saw you a lot, didn't I? I don't just come in here to buy food all the time, or something."

Tyler frowned, looking at the food he was laying out on the belt and then sucking his stomach in.

"Ah."

Josh hummed and scanned his items, even insisting that he bag them for him after Tyler had payed.

"Where are you headed?" Josh asked, handing Tyler his small amount of change, careful not to spill any because the till only had small change.  
"Home." Tyler huffed out a laugh and picked his bag up, hooking his arms in the hoops and readying to turn.

"Have a good night Tyler."  
Tyler only saw a snippet of the wink Josh sent him before he was hurdling out of the automatic doors to his car.

-

The kitchen was filled with different aromas.  
The chicken noodles boiling in the pan, the chicken pieces and pizza cooking in the oven, the cheesecake defrosting on the side and the chocolate donuts Tyler was mindlessly scoffing.

He licked his fingers of the sweet paste covering them and wiped his hand on a towel, walking back to the pan on the hob to turn the noodles and lower the heat.

He'd been thinking of this binge all week after putting one off for three weeks. It was the longest time he had steered away from the mass amounts of food and for some days he managed to munch continously through the day. Others, he tried not to eat at all.  
But now, his brain was fogged and his senses were all focused on the food.

He scratched at the back of his head, looking around the kitchen, eyes setting on the ice cream tub he had set on the side.  
He opened the lid and stuffed his finger into the frozen treat, pulling it back out to suck into his mouth.

The oven made a beeping noise and he turned away from his ice cream to grab his oven mit and open the door to the oven, pulling the tray with the chicken out and setting it down.

He was almost numb as he ate his way through the ice cream and chicken, the pizza and then the cheesecake and the rest of his donuts. He did get full until he started to get near the end of his biscuits, and his stomach got tight, cramps telling him to stop. But he didn't. He _couldn't_.

-

It was common for Tyler to sit in his bed and cry the next day.  
So he did.

He woke up and stared blankly at the wall in front of him for a couple of minutes, before burying his head in his hands and sobbing because he failed himself again, and he couldnt accept that even if he planned his binge beforehand.  
He didn't want to leave his bed- he didn't want to see his fat self in the mirror or leave his home, be seen by other people.

He let himself cry for the next ten minutes before he reached to his bedside table and got his journal, opening it to a new page.  
He scribbled out vague details of the previous night though his blurred vision, wiping at the wetness that dropped onto the page and smeared the ink.

He thought of a reason _why_ \- Tyler, why did you have that binge? But he couldn't think of a reason this time.

  
-

"You're apartment is massive, zack."  
"You're massive."  
Tyler scoffed, but when he went home, he cried and swore he wouldnt eat for the rest of the week.

-

Tyler had a two hour binge. 7,000 calories. He didn't vomit or cry.

-

"Jay, you've lost so much weight.".  
Tyler watched his mother compliment his brother with his eyes burning and throat closed. He had always been the skinny one.

-

Tyler looked at his body in the mirror. The way his stomach wasn't flat and sometimes hung over the waistband of his jeans, and his wrists weren't as thin as they used to be and he had a fatty neck even when he didn't try.  
That was why he didn't like to leave his home.  
He swore he'd only eat 1,500 calories a day now.

-

Tyler ate three bacon sandwiches and a multi-pack of chips before he even realised what he was doing.

-

  
The end of each month was daunting to Tyler, who went for his shopping because he got his pay.  
He always tried to steer away from the crappy foods because he was always trying not to eat them, so he scoured the health food aisles and got carrots and spices. He didn't pick up any junk food. He couldn't. He _shouldn't_.

He had a shopping trolly only half full when he went to pay, almost tempted to abandon his cart when he realised the man who'd helped him a couple of weeks ago after bumping into him was on the checkout that had the shortest queue.

He hummed quietly to himself, unloading his cart and pointedly ignoring the man staring at him, and the probability that others were, too. Because he was fat, and his face wasn't enjoyable to look at. He used to be attractive and slim, underweight even, but then the pressure of life happened and he had to buy new jeans and change all of his wardrobe so he had baggy clothing.

"Oh, hey, Tyler."

Tyler nodded his head minutely in acknowledgement and put a carton of milk on the belt, pulling his shopping closer so he could sift through it for the chilled stuff first.

Josh made a dissapointed noise and sighed, scanning his items and this time not going through the sentiment of bagging them for him, which only made Tyler feel worse and singled out, even if he knew that was stupid.

"Its... is it Josh?" He mumbled, knowing that perhaps he was being unreasonable. He wasn't used to anyone trying to talk to him, really.  
"Yeah! How are you? I haven't seen you in a while?" Josh beamed, his entire face wrinkling, eyes squinting.  
"I went to another store…" Tyler had went to a store another half mile from this one, just because he hadnt wanted to be around so many people again.  
"Right. What are you doing after this, then?"  
If Tyler had the self confidence of the average human, he would've said something like ' _are you hitting on me_?' but he would never be willing to make such a fool of himself. No one would want to flirt with him.

He shrugged, "probably just going home. Taking a shower, I guess." He felt his face warm up. Too much information.  
But Josh grinned, "cool. I finish when I close up my till. You want to do something?"  
Tyler nearly had a heart attack, his knees going weak because an attractive man wanted to hang out with him.  
"Why?" He questioned, scrunching his face up in confusion.  
This time, Josh faltered, "sorry, man, I have a tendency to… harrass people." Josh shook his head, "how many bags do you need?"

Tyler licked his lips, "three." Josh nodded and unhooked three bags from beside him, twisting in his stool to put them to the side. Tyler looked at the tattoo on his arm- uncompleted and colorful, and his stomach twisted. "If… if you want, I don't mind waiting for a while in my car. We could get food, or, or like a drink, actually." He changed quickly, his voice cracking a little. God, how stupid was he to suggest food when Josh could see how overweight and unfit he was?  
Josh stopped what he was doing, raising his eyebrows as if he was suprised someone as desperate and attention deprived as Tyler had said yes to going out with him. As friends. As acquaintances.  
"Really?"  
With a curt nod of Tylers head, Josh slapped his hand across the counter to Tyler, "dude, awesome. A drink. Lemme close my till."

-

Josh suggested they go to a store and buy drinks from there. What Tyler liked about Josh is that he was just as cheap and money preserving as Tyler liked ( _wished_ ) to be and he took it upon himself to buy Tylers drink and a muffin, which Tyler first denied and then his anxiety got the best of him and food was always a comfort. They picked sitting on the hood of Tylers car in the parking lot over going elsewhere.

"Why didn't you want a cake?" Tyler mumbled, his mouth already stuffed with the chocolate sponge, voice catching in an unattractive way. But Josh still smiled at him, leaning back and supporting his weight with one hand.  
"I already ate today."  
Tyler, being as woke as he was, checked Josh for any signs of some kind of eating disorder. He wasn't very well informed, but he'd be able to tell if Josh was starving himself.

Tyler swallowed and set the cake case down, wiping his hands on his jeans, "I don't know why I feel comfortable with you," he admitted.  
"Because I'm sweet?" Josh suggested, tongue coming out to lick the small spillage of coke down the side of his can.  
"Maybe."  
"Maybe I'm hot?"  
"Youre so full of yourself," Tyler scoffed, rolling his eyes. But his cheeks burned and he shifted under Josh's gaze.  
After a long pause, Josh added, "I'm usually really awkward, too. You feel safe."

-

Tyler stuck to eating 1800 calories a day for five days before he got laughed at when he was walking down his street, back from work and ready to go home and prepare a stir fry. He didn't know why they laughed, but he could only assume. He'd got in, locked the door, chest heaving because he was trying so hard not to cry. He couldn't stop the tears, though, and began to sob, tearing his thin Parker coat off, nails scratching at his stomach and arms.  
The immense amount of self hatred and belittling he felt made him cave, storming into his kitchen and grabbing the first thing to eat that he could see- bread. He didn't care- he ate three slices dry and then pulled out a pan, noodles and carrots and spices, throwing them all In and preparing quantities of food big enough to feed three people.

In a stupor he ate it all, followed by a block of cheese, before his head cleared and he cried again, holding his head in his hands and weeping. He was a failure - _fat and alone_.  
The guilt was so much. He couldn't ever handle it, especially alone.

He pulled himself together and retrieved his phone from the abandoned coat in the hallway, wiping his face before going to his contacts and selecting Josh's number.  
"Hey, do you… want to come to my house, maybe?"

  
He cleaned his mess before Josh arrived, didn't want Josh knowing how much of a greedy pig he was, and answered the door before Josh could even knock.

-

It was strange to be confident and uncaring around someone he didn't even know properly, Tyler thought. Probably because he was lonely and desperate, but he found himself laying his head on Josh's legs as they watched ' _alien vs predator_ ', which bored Tyler and intrigued Josh.  
He let his mind wonder, which was always a bad idea, especially after a guilt meal bigger than Tyler could handle, and hot tears were soon rolling over the bridge of his nose and down the side of his face.  
Josh's hand, previously stroking nonchalantly through his hair, stopped and travelled down to his face, running over his wet cheeks.

"Are you crying? I don't think the film is _that_ bad. I'll turn it off?"  
Tyler snorted and elbowed at Josh's chest playfully, not expecting the gasp and whispered 'ouch'.  
"Shit, sorry, did I hurt you? I didn't think I did it that hard." He apologised, voice thick and wavering, heating up with embarrassment, and pushing himself from Josh's lap.

Josh ran a gentle hand over his chest, shaking his head, "you didn't, I just…" Josh chewed his lips, looking up in consideration. "I'll show you something. It's pretty cool, actually."  
Tyler brow furrowed as he watched Josh shuffle around and slowly raise and bend his arms, tugging his shirt up carefully.  
Tyler squinted and then grimaced, looking at the swelling and painful looking bruising and scabs around Josh's nipples.  
"What the hell, Josh?" He exclaimed, not loudly, gaping at the healing mess in front of him.

Josh huffed out a laugh, wringing his shirt in his hands, "you don't know what it is?" Tyler shook his head no, "okay, cool, then."  
"No- what is it?" He hated how curious he was, prying into other people's buisness all the time.

"Okay, it's. I'm… transitioning."  
"Transitioning?"  
Arms coming to cover his chest, Josh nodded slowly, "It's means-"  
"No, I know, thats... I don't mind." Tyler decided on, hoping Josh wasn't feeling offended or patronised by anything he said, or had ever done before. "So, it hurts?" He discreetly pulled Josh's arms away from his chest to get a better look.  
"Not so much anymore, it just sensetive."  
"How long ago did you… get it done."  
"Like, a month nearly."  
He'd had an operation to remove sensetive chest skin and he was at work? That seemed ridiculous to Tyler.  
"I started work again after a couple weeks. It's not so bad- I still have to bind at night, hey look-  
She totally just stabbed that alien."  
Attention turned to the movie, Tyler settled back down, any previous conversation let go but not forgotten. It didn't matter, anyway. Tyler could have a trans friend, he still had questions, bu it didn't mean anything.

-

"…so, why were you crying? Yesterday."  
"I ate enough food for five people in twenty minutes before you came."  
Josh went silent, hands fiddling in his lap. His shirt was off eventhough they were outside of his workplace. He was proud of his newly constructed chest, willing to show it off because he knew Tyler wasnt bothered by it, if anything just curious.  
"So... Binge eating?"  
Tyler sniffed, preventing snot from dripping onto his top lip, "yeah."  
"How long?"  
"I don't remember."

-  
"They docked my wages because of the time off, which they were supposed to pay, and then short payed me because of a 'malfunction', apparently, and now my freaking water is cut off because I can't get the money to pay for it until _tomorrow_. Why the hell couldn't they just wait?"

Tyler let Josh rant angrily down the phone, feeling pissed off for him, making small sympathetic noises when he felt they were needed. Part of him wanted to mention the fact that Josh was mistreated more than the others, and it was likely because he was transgender and they thought they could take advantage of that. But he didn't say that. He didn't want Josh to over think, too.

"What am I supposed to do? I got some shopping and I _had_ to buy a new binder and cream because I _needed_ it. That shit should come with the surgery fee, and water should be free anyway! I'm gonna get infected and i smell so bad already, im sweating so bad. Fuck, what was the fucking point of even-"  
"Josh, shut up, God." Tyler uttered, picking at a tear in the inner thigh of his jeans, "come to my place until you can sort your bills. I have water, just bring some stuff."

Josh breathed out heavily, "…are you sure?"  
Tyler sucked on his teeth- he didn't have anything planned for tonight and his house was clean because he decided to tidy instead of eat when he got bored.  
"Yeah, I'm sure. Hurry though, it'll get dark soon and I'll lock you out."  
Josh sniggered, "sure. I'll bring food."  
Tyler smiled slightly, but that quickly turned to a frown. Josh knew he had a problem. Maybe he forgot. Maybe he had a fat fetish. Or he just knew Tyler would be willing to do anything for food because he was unhealthy and didn't love himself.

Knowing he had nothing to do, Tyler waited for Josh. He only took ten minutes to arrive, but in that time Tyler had thought of every possible scenario that could go down. Most were not likely, but he'd never had anyone sleep in his room or couch since Zack had slept a year ago for two hours after a party.  
He was fairly certain Josh wouldn't want to sleep with him, or not sleep in his home at all, but he had spare bed sheets.

Josh said he'd be ten minutes, but he took twenty.  
"Couldn't find my wallet," he explained, shuffling through the hallway with a large bag in his hands, dangling by his waist.  
"Have you ate anything?"  
"Uh huh. I just brought some snacks for later." As if suddenly remembering Tylers eating tendencies, his face widens, "Wait, that's okay, right?"  
Rolling his eyes, Tyler replied with yes and then, "you know where the bathroom is? Obviously. There towels in there, too, for when you wanna shower."  
Josh grinned, "thank you. I'm going to wash now- you _really_ won't want me near you right now."  
Josh toed off his sneakers and brushed past Tyler to the stair case, and he was right- he smelt so bad, Tyler scrunched his nose up. There were sweat stains showing through his sweater. It was gross but part of Tyler thought it was hot, still inhaled his scent needily.

-

Laid on Tylers bed, they each held their phones close to their faces in the dark, the old TV in the corner playing a default channel that was mostly static.  
Occasionally, Josh would giggle and show Tyler his screen when he found something funny, and then Tyler would smile and pretend it was funny, too.  
"I did some research."  
"Hm?"  
"On- on binge eating. Did you know that's an eating disorder?"  
Tyler stilled, clicked the screen off button for his phone and sat up, "yeah. I knew it was an eating disorder."  
"So… do you see someone?"  
"I went to the doctor once."  
Josh dropped it, seemingly satisfied with Tylers answer.  
"Do you really think you're fat?"  
Tyler closed his eyes, " _Yes_."  
The bed shook as Josh pushed himself up to sit cross-legged, a hand touching Tylers shoulder.  
"Tyler, you're not fat."  
"I'm ugly." Tyler sighed, " _and_ fat."

Josh whined sadly, "No, Tyler, what," he embraced him, and Tyler almost wanted to push him away, but instead he pulled him closer, wrapping his arms tightly around Josh's body.  
"I am, I-I am-"  
Josh hushed him, putting a hand on the back of his hand and pressing it into his shoulder. Even after a bath, Josh still smelt strange, Tyler found, but he found it comforting.  
"Please believe me."  
  
Tyler exhaled shakily, finding peace in the way he was encased by Josh's body, shifted closer with his hips .  
Josh made a strange noise, patting Tylers back before pushing him away gently.  
"Sorry." Tyler mumbled, scooting backward awkwardly. He was too clingy, too easy to win over.  
"I don't mind, just... a personal thing."  
Tyler nodded in understanding, even if he didn't, looking at him briefly before he lost control of himself, much like when he ate, and forced his lips to Josh's. Hands against his chest threw him back.

"Not right now. Not now."

-

By 2am, Josh was asleep, and Tyler was sat in his kitchen, chewing on a snicker bar, whimpering around it with tears drying on his face.  
The table top was littered with other chocolate wrappers and cake tubs- he'd forgotten about the stash until he really needed it.

He felt sick already, but that didn't stop him- it usually didn't. He continued to eat anything he could find, his legs and jaw shaking because he was trying to stop crying, and failing.  
He thought about how he split another pair of jeans, his chin was getting bigger, the tops of his arms were fatty and his thighs splayed out when he sat down, when he tried to do squats he couldn't handle it. His own body couldn't handle it's weight, and that _sickened_ him.

It sickened him enough that his stomach began to turn, his hands balling into fists on his thighs as he attempted to fight the wave of nausea rolling through him.

He heard a quiet padding, opened his eyes enough to see Josh appear at the door way, before running to the kitchen sink where he let his stomach empty itself, all the food he'd stuffed himself with coming back up painfully.

Josh's hand came to run up and down his back as he gagged a few times,officially done.  
He hung his head, gasping breathlessly, tears that had been forced from his eyes running down the side of his face.  
"That's never happened before," he rasped, not even able to feel ashamed or embarrassed.  
Josh chuckled lightly, unsure if this was something Tyler should be making light of, "are you okay? What… what set this off?"

Clearing his throat, he shrugged, "I guess feeling… everything. _Everything_."

-

After six weeks, Josh's chest was fully healed, and whenever Tyler saw him he was shirtless, most likely to be seen running his hands over his chest and pressing his finger tips over his newly healed nipples.

"I can't... I just can't believe. Gosh." His next breath came out as a shudder, "I never thought I'd be able to get this."  
Tyler smiled at him, eyes squinted, "they look amazing... can I touch?"  
Laughing tearfully, Josh turned away from the mirror, "of course, here-" he took Tylers hands and brought them up, letting Tyler explore the skin there. He told Tyler he'd had periareolar surgery because it left the least amount of scarring, and was less obvious.  
"Its not totally numb, it's like tingling, but they're gone. They're really gone. I mean, they have been for a while but it didnt feel real." He sighed, closing his eyes peacefully, lips pulled up to the side. "That's nice."

Tyler swallowed heavily, watching Josh relax against the bathroom counter, looking undeniably hot, so happy and content.  
"…yeah?"  
Josh, being slightly shorter than him, opened an eye to look up at him, " _yeah_." He closed them again, shifted his hips forward against Tylers suggestively.  
Biting his lip, he continued his exploration, hands skimming further down Josh's stomach, before he was drawn into a kiss, Josh's arms moving to wrap around his neck, pulling him impossibly closer.

It takes them a full three minutes before they could tear away from one another, and then they're moving to Tylers bedroom, stumbling over each other to get there first, fumbling with clothing.

"Not my shirt- I want to keep that on, please."  
Josh nodded, soothing a hand over Tylers cheek, patting his shoulder, and shucking his own pants off, looking at Tyler expectantly.  
Tyler removed the bottom half of his clothes slowly, not to tease, but because of the internal battle going on. Someone seeing him naked for the first time in years. He wasn't attractive. He was awkward and unkempt, he wore tatty comfort underwear whereas Josh wore Kalvin Klein briefs that hung off his hips handsomely.

Josh had been born a female and he had a better body than himself, Tyler thought bitterly, soon disregarding the thought and hoping that wasn't _transphobic_ , or something. It was his own fault he was so horribly put together, anyway.

"I-I should find lube, or something, I think I have-"  
"Tyler, I don't need it, remember?" Josh caught him with a hand on his shoulder, pulling him back, biting his lip and rubbing the front of his boxers.  
Tyler looked at him in concern, before understanding. Josh didn't have a dick, he had to remember.  
"Right, jeez, uh. Okay." Tyler laughed a little in embarrassment, ran a hand through his mussed hair. "I've never done this with…" he cleared his throat, wanting to melt into the ground, "someone with…"  
"Just calm down please, you're making me nervous." He shuffled back onto the bed, all clothing but his boxers gone, waiting patiently for Tyler to prepare.

"I'm... I'm scared I might mess up, or hurt you, or… not be good enough. Do you think this is too soon?"

Josh whined in disagreement, "no, please Tyler, I'm so hard for you already, please,"  
Tylers eyes bulged at his terminology, " _hard_?"  
"Mhm, n'wet, Ty. I know you're scared, but… so am I. I've never done this a-as… _me_."  
Josh was lifting his hips, pulling dark underwear from them, down his legs and kicking them off his feet. There was nothing Tyler could say about his genitalia- it was nothing special or magical, except his enlarged clitoris that _really was hard_. Perhaps he should have done more research, or something.

Tyler was being selfish, he decided, so he nodded, climbing onto the matress and kneeling between Josh's muscled legs, admiring them, and his entirety. Tylers ugliness was a great contrast for Josh's beauty.

They spent another few minutes feeling, exploring bodies, Josh's hands coming up under Tylers shirt, splaying over his back as Tyler scissored his fingers around the base of Joshs clit- or the shaft. He didn't know what Josh preferred.  
"What-what do I call it?"  
Josh gasped, hips jumping, "anything, _anything_."

Tyler buried his face into Josh's neck, inhaling the scent he thought about so often- sweat, musk, _Josh_.  
Tyler sunk a finger into him, slick and hot, and Josh murmured something like, "might wanna keep away from my pits- sweat a lot,". Tyler snorted and kissed the space near his underarms anyway, curled his finger.

"Condom?"  
"Don't need one."

Hunkering down over him, lips skimming over Josh's chest, Tyler pushed in slowly, gentle and considerate.  
"Haven't- haven't done this in so long, _ah_ ,"  
Josh is tight and It had to be a bit painful, so Tyler flicked his fingertips over Josh's pleasure spot comfortingly, "okay?"  
Eyes closed, raw lips, "Y-yeah. S'tight."  
"I know," Tyler sighed, leaning his forehead against heated skin, Josh ran a hand through Tylers hair, tugging at the base of his skull.

"Feels good. Forgot that… what it was like. It's different."  
Tyler thrusted slowly, letting Josh, and himself, get used to the feeling, one hand moving between them to rub Josh's clit, who shifted and took over, "better like this."  
He guided Tylers hand so he used a finger and thumb, jacking it like he would with a cock, but softer because Josh was sensetive. His arm and wrist hurt at the angle, but he kept going, wanting to get Josh off, make him feel good.

He sped up when Josh asked him to, a hand grasping for purchase at the skin of his arse, "move- faster, ah, God-"  
Josh was so wet and hot, and his thighs trembled where they were bracketing Tyler. Tyler who increased his speed, slipping in and out of Josh's cunt with ease, no blood or pain, only pleasure.

"M'close," Josh said, voice whiney and more nasal than usual, fumbling to shove Tylers hand away to replace it with his own, going faster and rougher until he contracted hotly around Tyler, gushing, curling in on himself, moaning and smiling, "fuck, fuck,"  
"Jeez," Tyler rolled his hips languidly, coming to a stop as he finished, biting into Josh's pink skin, breath stuttering.

"Thank you, Tyler, thank you,"  
Tyler wasnt sure why Josh was thanking him, his eyes fluttering shut, too tired to think, falling asleep before he'd even pulled out.

-

The two days Josh had stayed with Tyler consisted of sex and food- Tyler was only used to the food, but having Josh with him to cuddle, and talk, and fuck was a distraction better than any other. He learnt more about Josh than he'd ever wished to know about a person before, and Josh made him feel like a sex God and attempted to make him feel more confident about himself.

  
"I don't believe that you _actually_ think you're fat."  
Tyler rolled his eyes, "we've had this conversation before, I believe."  
Josh sighed in exasperation, "You're not, though, seriously, your self esteem is so low it terrifies me."  
"Seriously, just leave it."  
Josh stared at him sadly and Tyler gritted his teeth, "Josh, fucking look."  
He tore his shirt off, throwing it to the side before he could think about how awful being seen by Josh would make him feel.  
He only looked at himself briefly before he had to look away in disgust, "I'm fucking fat Josh." He finalised, knowing his stomach would be hanging over his jeans and the ugly stretchmarks would be more visible.

  
He wanted to reach for reach for his shirt again, cover up and tell Josh to leave, stop looking at him, but Josh was touching him, nonplussed by Tylers nudity, seemingly in awe, and concerned.  
"Tyler, you're… you're not fat. Tyler, you're perfect, this is-"  
Tyler picked his shirt back up, "told you. It's ugly and I need to diet-"  
"Tyler, you're not. Don't you see it? You're not fat, hell youre not even _overweight_."  
Tyler disagreed disdainfully, replaced his shirt, "Whatever, Josh, just don't ask me to do that again."

-

Josh was relaxed against the settee when Tyler bounded in, naked to his entirety as if it was normal for him.  
He placed himself on top of Josh, not in a sexual way, just in an embrace and nuzzled his chest. His beautiful, toned chest.

"…Tyler?"  
He could feel Tylers smile into his skin, "I'm not fat. I'm not fat anymore."

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> The ending is rushed I know, but I really wanted to stop seeing this in my writing app. I'm trying to think of idea for the other stories.  
> Lets imagine the ending is like a couple months later or whatever
> 
> My instagram is @sickeningwreck and my tumblr is le0oxx


End file.
